Sunday, May 16, 2010

Love Science Helps Marriages


John Gottman’s research that tells us in distressed relationships both partners are trying to make repair with the other as much or more as in non-distressed relationships. Really? Yes, people are trying but the repair attempts are not accepted, or maybe the repair attempts just aren’t recognized.

As a field, couple’s therapy knows a lot more about love these days then we ever knew before.

There is a new science of love and knowing about it will keep you informed, help you with your own relationships or let you help someone you care about improve their relationship or save a family.

Why does this even matter? Because people who are happily married have:

  • better health,
  • less disease,
  • improved emotional stability,
  • happier children who learn better and out perform children of divorce across the board,
  • feel better about themselves,
  • are happier,
  • earn more money
  • and live longer!

As humans, we don’t attach, bond and create a family with the intention of breaking up. I’ve never met a couple yet who wanted their relationship to fail, and yes, sometimes divorce is the best of two bad choices. But there is a third option becoming reliably available for most distressed couples (more on this coming)…

What is this science of love?

It is a branch of couple therapy that has put together the puzzle of how to help couples create secure bonds and lasting happiness. This science provides knowledge about how to create security in the couple relationship. It’s becoming more well known among therapy professionals but the information isn’t widely known by the general population.

Couple distress is understandable these days! And, couple distress can be changed when even one member of the couple learns about the science of love.

You can learn about the science of love and how you can use this research based knowledge to help your relationship, or someone you care about.

We’ll keep exploring this science of love and facets to it on this blog. If you liked this, sign up for my eletter at

Here’s to a life of loving!


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